Being Honest: God Has Disappointed Me

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Has God ever disappointed you? He’s disappointed me, many times, if I’m going to be honest. Which obviously I am.

Several things have influenced this post. One, last week someone I know objected to Philip Yancey’s book ‘Disappointment with God’. I don’t think they quite understood the point of the book, nor Yancey’s style, which is usually about brutal honesty.

Second, I find myself once again disappointed with many things in my life that I have hoped for. And after each disappointment, each fresh realisation that actually certain things MAY NEVER happen that I hope(d) for, I have to go back to a startling revelation that was given to me years and years ago, and tends to become deeper and deeper every time I get to this point of disappointment: The point of my life is to find joy in it. In the life I have. In the circumstances I am in, regardless of what they are. The point is not to find joy in the life I wish I had; the life I live in my dreams; a life that can sometimes become so real that the only response to my own life is disappointment and depression and frustration that God doesn’t seem to care much about the life I WANT.

God is more committed to our life than we are. Let me reiterate it to drive it home. He is more committed to my life than I am. I want the life of my dreams, he wants me to enjoy the life I’ve actually got. It’s like I’m munching on a delicious and juicy nectarine but thinking to myself that I’d prefer an orange. Oh why, Lord, did you give me this delicious nectarine? I want an orange. And so I miss just how wonderful the nectarine is because my mind is thinking about how great it would be if I had an orange.

God seems very interested in giving us joy IN our circumstances, not just taking our circumstances away. Joy is in God, not in our circumstances going away. I have to keep learning that lesson. The miracle of a life in God is being joyous in the troubles of life, not the troubles of life just being taken away. Yes, God does take away some troubles, but there are other troubles that seem to stay. But yet God is there, ready to give us joy in the midst of those troubles, as we cling to our great hope that finally, one day, EVERY tear will be wiped away and everything will, at last, be made new. Including us.

8 thoughts on “Being Honest: God Has Disappointed Me”

  1. I totally agree with Amy from your other blog post. Everyone I know is so certain that my heart is so hardened, but really who’s fault is that? God has to know a person can only go so long before they grow weary and reach their breaking point…its almost as though he just wants to break some people tell they really don’t have the will do live while others it seems he goes out of his way to help. All I know is that I am beyond hope on this very subject. For years I thought God could and would help me get through things and you know what he never did.

    “A man who could end my misery with one click of his finger, he chooses not. …. Is it not cruel?”

    Agreed. God doesn’t love equally. That is obviously clear.

    1. I totally agree with you. To me He’s evil and cruel. It’sjust not worth having him in your life because his abandonment hurts even more. He has betrayed and disappointed me too many times. I just quit, if I’m wrong, then I’m sure he’ll understand and if he wants, maybe he’ll do something about it, in the meantime, I choose to stay away and or think about him.

    1. I have not read The Horse and His Boy…although I caught the wikipedia page once before when I was trying to figure out Lewis’ different books (after of course seeing the Narnia movies heh).

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